"Don't it always seem to go,

that you don't know what you've got 'til it's gone."

Or, at least, until you think it's gone. As horrible as it must be to think you've lost someone you care about, it must be equally as wonderful of a feeling to realize that you were mistaken. I'm sure both sides of that coin involve a high level of disbelief too. It's just funny what we take for granted as people; things we enjoy that we don't really appreciate; people we care about that we never bother to tell.

Me? Well, I recently thought that I'd lost a friend, and I'm sad to say that I didn't truly appreciate them as a friend until I thought they were gone. (They're not, btw.) But how many people am I like that with? How many others play a role in my life, and I'm oblivious to it. Or worse, I try to change that role to what I think it should be? I wonder how many women friends I've missed out on over the years, either because I told them there was interest and it spooked them (not unlike certain horses I know), or because I wasn't able to just accept the friendship. One of my best friends for, oh, going on 8 years now is a woman that I held a mammoth crush on for about 3-4 of those years. Most women, hell, most people I know are neither that patient nor that tolerant. I'm grateful that April was, because I really couldn't've asked for a better friend. I have a couple friends like her; lol... most of them are dudes though, they weren't forged from the same fires of romantic interest that she was.

Anyway, this is kind of an apology to this recent friend of mine; not so much for expressing an interest (because I truly did try to keep that to a minimum), but for being arrogant enough to harbor the hope of something more without truly appreciating what I already had. I'm glad to call you my friend, and should you need anything, including advice on guys (there's not much to say; we're simple creatures), you have only to ask. I've quoted it before (even on here), and I'll quote it again (probably on here as well): "True friendship is when you can come to me in 15 years, having not seen me for 10 years, and need a place to stay, and know that you have a place to stay." Friendships like these are rare indeed in this world, and I'm thankful for those that I have. I'll leave with a quote from Calvin and Hobbes:

Calvin: "I wish I had more friends, but people are such jerks. If you can just get most people to ignore you and leave you alone, you're doing good. If you can find even one person you really like, you're lucky. And if that person can also stand you, you're really lucky."

Hobbes: "What if you find someone you can talk to while you eat apples on a bright fall morning?"

Calvin: "Well, yeah... I suppose there's no point in getting greedy, is there?"