more irony

Okay, so, just fyi, here's the death throes of my relationship. This is after a day and a half of not hearing anything after my last texts.


Is it really that easy to 'give me space' when you know I'm hurt and upset?

You insulted me by calling my advice 'Dr Phil boxed bullshit.' I'm sorry that I can't be what you need when it comes to consoling.

We'll talk later. I'm with friends at the moment

Don't bother.

All I needed was for you to care what was happening in my life. You didn't even ask what happened. How can you advise me on a situation when you don't know the situation?

I'm sorry; you seem to do nothing but complain about your job. You're a smart guy and if you don't like putting up with low-level shit, then do something about it.

has changed a lot in the past three weeks. I'm sorry I'm concerned about an uncertain future and I'm sorrier still that three weeks of turbulence for me is a bother to you.

I can't change the way I was raised. I was taught that your job is your own and what happens there is up to you, and in my eyes I'M lucky to have a job and no matter what goes on I have to roll with it and ultimately when things get shakey I have to make choices.

Then I am truly sorry, because I was raised that when someone I care for has a problem, I treat it as my own. I never trivialized Becca's butchering of a song, despite that it was an easily solvable problem: go to different bar. But I listened to anything and everything you had to say. Tuesday I felt like you didn't care about me at all; that my hard times were inconvenient for you. That hurt more than you can know.

Then I guess we're at an impass. Someone being ill or hurt is a hard time; dissatisfaction with a job is a minor problem that can't be solved by complaining. I know what your saying and I know you think I'm being cold, but there are too many wonderful things in life to fret over a job. You must have to go through something like we went through this Friday. It was my mom's 4 month check up; she could have gone in and found out that her cancer was back. That's something I could console you about; not your job.

An impass it is then. Not everything in life is 'life or death.' Many things depend on our own point of view; if I see something as a problem, then, for me, it is. I will always be around if you need me. But if I can't turn to you with my problems, then we are lost. If I have to face the world alone, then I may as well be alone. I love you. I'm sorry I'm not strong enough to see the world as you do.

Lighten up Chris. All I'm saying is there are things to worry about and things to let go. I would never want you to go through what my family has been through in the past year, but let me tell you this: it puts everything in its place. What's the serenity prayer? God grant me the serentity to accept the things I can not change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.

, I am fully aware that there are things worse than a bad day. But when I dwell on them, I feel depressed and helpless. I try to stay positive and optimistic about life, but I am only human. I am going to want to talk about bad days, even if they aren't apocalyptic. This isn't about my job anymore; its that I no longer feel like I can turn to you if I need to. I can't lighten up about that. And 'don't bother'? That only accented for me that my feelings are trivial to you.

I'm sorry you feel that way; I guess when it comes down to it we're just never going to see eye to eye on this; and if all this is an earth shattering reality to you and something that will cause us not to see each other again, then we weren't very strong as a couple in the first place.

I wanted to talk about it. You said don't bother. To me, that says that you didn't think we were worth saving. I care about you and I always will. But this is a deal breaker for me, because I feel like I only matter to you in my good times, and there's more to me than that.

I don't want to go around about this anymore; it's going nowhere. I simply meant that I didn't want to interrupt your time with your friends. I hurt you; you hurt me; whatever. Being in a relationship is obviously not right for us. I hope you can find someone that can give you the attention and care that you need. I was your girlfriend; you already have a mother and I'm not looking to replace her.

And so it ends. I wish you nothing but the best in life. I hope you find someone strong with whom to share happiness. I'm sorry it can't be me, but I hope our paths one day cross again. I meant it when I said you could always turn to me. Please don't hesitate to if you ever need to.



So that's that. I'll comment on all this tomorrow, especially why I think it's worthy of calling "more irony" (hint: It has to do with the things I'm willing to complain about.) But I just wanted to get this up for all (two) inquiring minds out there. Have a good night.