ARRRRRRRRRR!!!!!

The restaurant I work at sits on a river. In my dream last night, however, this became an ocean (or at least a bay). And from that larger body of water, we were the victims of frequent pirate raids. I'd had enough, so I started trying to assemble a team of coworkers to counter-attack the pirates on their own turf, in a somewhat-secret cove. That was the basic plot of my dream.

It was quite intricate though. I was going through a list of people in my head who would join me in my efforts. It was all guys (I guess I didn't feel right taking women into battle), and they were all front-of-the-house employees (which is strangely normal for me; I see the back-house guys as coworkers, and I have no beefs with any of 'em, but my front-house coworkers I see as more "commrades-in-arms." They're the ones I always think of for a party, or birthdays, or whatever). Anyway, I was thinking "Chad could fight... Bo... Thomas..." and I came up with five people besides myself who might join in my raid, but I needed intel on how many pirates there were. That was problem number 1, 'cause we could each handle 5-6 pirates at once, but if there were more than that, we might have a problem (I don't know why we were such great fighters, but it was implied that our style was kung-fu). So I planned on this event being a few months down the road so the proper info could be gathered. (Plus, we needed the time for me to take a trip to China so we could get high-quality combat-steel swords really cheap.)

Also, the timing was important. When should we attack? If this was a couple months down the road, it couldn't be after work, 'cause we'd be in full summer-swing and we'd all be too tired to fight after work. So I decided we'd have to request to work only a day shift on a Friday, and use the evening-time to attack. This way we'd still have plenty of energy to fight because we'd be used to working an additional five hours anyway.

There was a crusty old guy working with us too, whose advice I was asking as far as where the cove was, how we should attack, etc. But the funny thing is, there was no record of him ever being an employee. Even the bookkeeper showed no evidence of ever having cut him a check. But everyone remembered him working there when they started, so no one doubted that he was a real employee. No one, except me, when upon asking his advice he would ramble incoherently about something totally off-topic. He was a pirate spy!

Although the attack never happened in my dream, the plan was worked out to the details. We couldn't canoe all the way into the cove, 'cause the oars might make noise and give away our presence while we were still all clumped together- an easy target. So we would canoe in just far enough so that we could swim easily, and we'd be in a line, attached by a long length of rope between each of us. Everyone would start to move when the line in front of them was pulled taught, and when the line went limp, they knew a) how far they were from landing at the battle and b) that the person in front of them had joined the fray. We had to attack in waves. The distance between each of us was the same, so that just when the pirates thought they had the attack handled and the one (or more) of us was about to be overwhelmed, here comes the next reinforcement.



So, needless to say, it was an odd dream. I think it was partially fueled by the pirate/ninja rivalry depicted in the comics at: http://drmcninja.com/index.html (in the current storyline). And even the old pirate spy I can see coming from Dr. McNinja too (if you read the current storyline, you can kind of make the connection). For those of you who know me, you are aware that I typically daydream myself to sleep, and last night was a duel with me as a speed-enhanced chinese martial arts master fighting against an organized-crime-hired equally-speed-enhanced japanese martial arts master. So I can see how that lended itself to kung-fu fighting in my dream. What I want to know is, how in the FUCK did the ninja from my daydream end up in my friend/coworker's dream, as depicted below? ... strange things are afoot at the Circle K...

"So Im at a friends house with a few friends and apparently he has a sub mom (much like a sub teacher) and shes teaching us some random crap, I don't remember and then the place turns in to a daycare. A bunch of kids come in and start tearing up the place. We walk outside and it seems we've just come out of Circut City so they sit down on the curb and make a line to wait for the PS3 to launch. After a few min some Zombies come and try to get us. One of my friends is eaten. Pity. Then we decide "hey, we're hungry, lets get some food"...so I say "Ok I need to get gas first" so I take my car to the nearest station. Upon arrival some lady starts hitting on me so I drive up to the next pump where theres this old asian dude. Then out of nowhere this crazy ninja comes out and they start to fight. The ninja kills the old dude and then I realize Ive been watching this fight through a security camera and Im working at a Burger King. Then I wake up because I just can't take working at a BK, that is just too scary. "