last and least

This is my eye. It's not the best image, because 1) I'm a shitty photographer, 2) our digital camera sucks ass, and 3) I just used an old picture and cut my eyeball out to paste here. (Apparently, the rest of me is to grotesque to post.)

I had taken a picture of the side of my room with my bed (I sleep on wood), but because of lighting difficulties it didn't turn out, and I'm not going back upstairs to take another one. I'll spare you the suspense though. There's a bed, some wall, and a poster from The Crow that says "Believe in angels." Oh yeah, and a window that I sometimes like to hang myself out of so I can talk really loudly at the people walking by.

Now, you may be thinking to yourselves "Mr. The Stampede, Mr. Wannabe Sage... what's with all the pictures lately?" Well, the official press release is that I want to. But, the honest answer to your question is that there's a crazy lady out there with mind-control powers and an eye fetish, and she told me that if I didn't post these things, she'd take control of my dad and have him make another sword like the one he made me and kill me dead with it, and leave my blood lying in small pools around it. I didn't believe her at first, so but she demonstrated her powers by making my dad eat my angus burger from burger king. Folks, this is not a woman you want to screw with. She has a friend at the MVA that'll get her your addresses and everything. Heed my warnings! Beware the 1200 lb woman with the eye patch, the glass eye, the hook arm, the cork leg, the meat cleaver (you think I'm kidding about that?), and the amazing psychic, clairvoyant, and mind control abilities! She can make you d- ... ... I... apologize... for... writing... all... those... nasty... things... I... was... only... kidding... The... woman... of... which... I... was... speaking... is... kind... and... wonderful... and... beautiful... and... rightfully... deserves... to... rule... the... world... I... am... now... going... to... help... my... dad... make... a... sword... with... which... to... kill-I... mean... to... cook... Yes... a... cooking... sword...